Four Letter Word

Today is Thursday. I am thinking about last week when I drove to the store in the evening to get the emergency ice cream and Oreos. Driving around I couldn't help but think of the happy/stressful word that follows me around like a concrete block tied to my leg with a bit of rope. That four letter word that can make butterflies in my stomach or pains in my heart. HOPE. I've mentioned it here before again and again. You know that. Here it is again and there it was in my head that day driving to the store and walking around wondering NOT what it is I really want, but how I will make it happen. The butterflies, the stab in the heart. HOPE. Stupid hope, wonderful hope. You are everywhere I go.

Six Months and Counting

Today marks six months since we signed with our agency! I remember when we signed six months seemed like a very very long time. It has all gone by pretty fast when I think about it...but some moments seem to drag on forever (that probably doesn't make sense). I'm ready to fast forward.

~ Mama

Black-eyed Susans and Other Wild Ladies

January is a month of new beginnings. This is what I wrote on January 22:

Mother's Day is May 9th. I hope I remember to do something nice for my mother. A special person that raised 6 kids, at least two handfuls of neighbor kids and a boatload of grandchildren. Mother's Day. Maybe 2011 it will mean something completely different for me. Maybe.

On the weekend of May 9th I had a great weekend with my mom (and other moms too!). We had breakfast together and then drove to Tallahassee down 90 on a beautifully sunny spring day. The road was lined with yellow, pink and purple flowers. We listened to the radio and talked and when we arrived in Tallahassee we had a quick lunch and checked into our hotel.

I went to baby shower for some wonderful friends who I had not seen for awhile, and then had a very very nice dinner with mom. After dinner we hung out at the hotel and had a good nights sleep. The next morning I gave my mom a card that I had made for her before having breakfast and taking a long drive down the canopy roads in the country before heading back home.

It was a perfect weekend. I love my mom. She really is the best.

~mama

The Moments Missed

I know I shouldn't think about the moments missed before I've even had moments, but sometimes I am saddened that I will miss the first year or so of my child's life. I hope that's not silly. I know that the moment he/or she is in our hearts the most magic will begin.

Cute baby video below! Check it out.

~mama

A Year of Lex

8 weeks is very long

I called the FBI a few days ago begging them to pleeeeaase move my fingerprints up to the top of the pile. She said that they can't and it will be 2-3 more weeks. I have to admit that a little part of me hoped that she would hang up and feel compelled to help a poor girl out by sneaking in and moving them to the top. Not likely...but in my mind that's what should have happened.

Pssstt...shhhh, quiet- just between us

Pssssttt....hey, you....pssstt...FBI guy....listen, how about doing me a big favor and putting my fingerprints on the top of the pile? Give em' a little sneak a peek a loo and sending back in with a big ole stamp that says "mama is the best?" Can you do that for me? Thanks, you're the best. You are awesome.

mama

News of the Day

The U.S Dept of State, Office of Children’s Issues issued the following announcement today, May 13.

A U.S. interagency team held meetings to discuss an adoption agreement with their Russian counterparts on May 12. The meetings are ongoing and will continue on May 13. The initial talks were positive, productive and conducted in a spirit of cooperation. Both sides are interested in taking steps to increase the safeguards for adopted children. The discussions were technical in nature because they involve domestic laws of two countries. There is still important work to be done and this continues to be a high priority for both governments.

It is our understanding that there has been no change in the status of on-going inter-country adoptions originating from Russia. Many thousands of Russian children, who were not adopted by Russian families, have found loving, safe and permanent homes in the United States through inter-country adoption. We are pleased to be discussing with the Russian government a future approach to ensure intercountry adoptions continue.

This Just in...so far so good...

Still reading but this just popped up on the AP...

Russian official: accord reached on adoption deal

(AP) – 6 hours ago

MOSCOW — A senior Russian official says Russia and the United States have reached agreement on all key issues for a bilateral agreement on adoptions.

Children's rights ombudsman Pavel Astakhov said Wednesday that the draft agreement is expected to be approved on Friday and is likely to be signed within two months.

Russia has been urging the United States to sign an agreement on adoptions following the case of an 8-year-old Russian boy sent back to Moscow alone last month by his adoptive American mother.

Russian officials say they want more control over U.S. adoptions and the living conditions of Russian children in the United States.

Some 1,800 Russian children were adopted in the United States last year, according to the Russian Education and Science Ministry.

State Department Reviews Draft

The State Department received a draft agreement from Russia on May 1st. They are reviewing the document now in preparation for the discussion on May 12.

mama

Not Begging...but pretty darned close

I don't need much. I live pretty simply. The one thing that would make me happy...unbelievably happy (like riding my bike around the neighborhood with balloons tied to it happy) would be for my fingerprints to come back today. Please. That's all I need.

State Department Update

4/29/2010

There has been no official suspension in adoptions of Russian orphans by American parents. However, in some parts of Russia, we are aware that adoptions are being slowed down or delayed. The United States and Russia held their first round of talks on adoption issues in Moscow on April 29. The discussions focused on the U.S. and Russian concerns regarding protecting the welfare and rights of children being adopted internationally. The talks were productive and an expert-level working group will travel to Moscow for further discussions on an adoption agreement on May 12, 2010.

Department of State Update

April 20, 2010

We have received no official notification that adoptions of Russian orphans by Americans have been suspended, but it is clear the recent controversy has slowed down adoptions in some parts of the country.

Volcanic ash prevented the U.S. delegation from traveling to Moscow over the April 17^th weekend.The talks in Moscow between U.S. and Russian officials are now rescheduled for April 29 and 30. The United States plans to emphasize the importance of this issue, and will discuss our mutual concerns about how to better protect the welfare and rights of children and all parties involved in intercountry adoptions. Many thousands of Russian children have found loving, safe and permanent homes in the United States through intercountry adoption. Families in the United States have adopted more than 50,000 children from Russia.

UPDATE: Okay, so it is currently 3:20 a.m. on the 29th in Moscow. Are we settled?

mama

The One Thing I Know

I don't know how you slept last night.
I don't know what you had for breakfast.
I don't know if you laughed
or if you cried.
I don't know what you're wearing.
Or if you smiled.
I don't know how you smell,
or how soft your skin is
I don't know what color your hair is
or your eyes
Or if you've felt the rain
or sun on your face
Do you like the sound of soft music?
Are your feet and hands oh so soft?
I don't know who you are...

but I do know that I love you.

mama

Through thick (volcano ash) and thin..,and a terrible terrible mistake.

Volcanic ash prevented the U.S. delegation from traveling to Moscow over the April 17th weekend.The delegation now plans to travel to Moscow during the week of April 25. They plan to emphasize the importance of this issue to the United States, and will discuss our mutual concerns about how to better protect the welfare and rights of children and all parties involved in intercountry adoptions. Many adoption cases are continuing to move forward in the courts including a few people that I know (who have managed to make it through the flight delays). Fingers crossed for you all! Squeeze your little one tight!

Wanna Help?

Please sign this petition for the US and Russian Presidents!

http://www.gopetition.com/online/35485.html

Thank you,

mama

Gliding Along

Remaining positive.
Keeping our thoughts with those already planning trips who have met their referral.
Hoping for the best.
Knowing things will work out just fine.

Mama.

UPDATE 4.12.10~
(CNN) -- Top officials from the U.S. State Department plan to travel to Moscow this week to push Russia to allow adoptions by U.S. families to continue.

Anxious Hearts

Being patient is not something I am good at, but I know it's something I need to get used to if I'm going to keep my sanity. On to fingerprints #3. Tuesday morning I went to the Sheriff's Office (I had been going to UPD because they do ink prints and they are free- which is very important right now) to see if they could give this fingerprinting thing a try. I brought photocopies of the unreadables and told them my horrible story of being print-less after four months of trying. The sweet print lady, Sharleen said that she thought I should try the Live Scans instead....and of course I told her that the agency said INK PRINTS ONLY-NO BIOMETRICS. As it turns out the live scans are not biometrics. They scan the prints so they can tell the quality and then print them on the card...voila! They look just like regular prints! I also found out that my prints are worn (no doubt from typing all day) and would probably never make a good ink print. The Sheriff's Office wrote a note about my worn prints to include in the packet. I did the Live Scan and called the HS Agency and told them what happened. They seemed to think that this should work. I do hope so. I also hope that it doesn't take another 8 weeks...but it probably will. I went to the bank for a certified check and then to the post office and sent those suckers off.

Meanwhile, we can't do anymore paperwork until I get the prints. We have everything ready to go, ready to be notorized and apostilled...BUT we don't want the dates on these documents to expire...so we wait...wait wait wait.

8 weeks is a long time when your heart is anxious.

mama

Green Plastic World

Does a child really need so many giant plastic toys? I really am overwhelmed by the yards full of plastic toys that I drive by...sitting covered in pollen and mildew neglected in the Florida heat. The houses I visit with piles and piles of plastic untouched toys in the corner. The parent who says "she never plays with those, she'd rather play with the cardboard or in the the dirt." I dearly hope that I don't fall into that consumerist mode. There's more to parenting than shopping. My nieces would rather I push them on the tire swing or play a game where I hide toys in the yard for them to find. I've bought plastic doll houses at yard sales for them and they sit in the yard today. They played with them for a few minutes (literally) and then never touched them again.

Grrr...

FBI fingerprints round 2 = unreadable. Very annoying.